Talking to Your Child About School Shootings

Knowing what to say or do when your child asks about school shootings can be difficult. We are here to help. Dr. Mandler, Chief Medical Officer at Orchard Place, provides ways you can engage in conversation. 

Start the Conversation:

Active Listening in a quiet place

Start with open-ended questions like, “Have you heard anything about school shootings?” This allows them to share their thoughts and feelings.

Let them express their feelings without interruption, don’t start interrupting with attempts to reassure that it won’t happen to them.

Validate their emotions and let them know that it’s okay to feel scared or confused.

Provide Reassurance:

Tell them that their safety is the top priority, and there are many adults working to keep them safe.

Reassure them that the chances of a school shooting happening at their school are very low.

Limit Exposure to News:

Limit exposure to news and social media regarding such incidents. And if you are going to let them watch the news, be available to provide context and comfort.

Tell them it is OK to ask questions if they come across information that worries them.

Emphasize Preparedness:

Discuss safety protocols that are in place at their school, such as lockdown drills.

Teach them what to do in case of an emergency, emphasizing the importance of following the instructions of teachers and staff.

Promote Healthy Coping Mechanisms:

Encourage them to share their feelings with you, teachers, or school counselors.

Discuss healthy coping mechanisms, such as breathing to relax, or engage in hobbies or crafts.

Check back with them later:

Let them know that it’s okay to bring up the topic again if they have more questions or concerns.

Check in periodically to see how they are feeling and if there are any changes in their emotions.